we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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