Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
