Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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