I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize