Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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