don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize