Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
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