He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
