I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
so much tequila, so little girl.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
