Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
It's blow job season.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize