i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
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