I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Randomize
