I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize