I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
