Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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