worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize