We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
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