420 ftw
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Randomize
