he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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