So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
