Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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