chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Verdict: uncircumcised.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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