I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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