when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
