Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I got her a Nickelback box set.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
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