i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
