I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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