Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize