My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
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