i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I wish my penis had an off switch
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize