Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
