hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Define "chronic" masturbator.
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Fuck appropriateness.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
