I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
