Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Randomize