I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Randomize
