sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
