told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize