It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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