singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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