Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
