dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize