Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
