In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
