I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize