You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize