I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
