Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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