Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
