He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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