No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
We had to coat check the pizza.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
